What to do when you’re on your knees

I’m feeling a bit nervous about this one.

I can feel the butterflies fluttering around.

This blog’s topic is going to be really raw, vulnerable, and honest. But that’s why we’re here, right?

We’re diving into what to do when you’re absolutely on your knees. Because, say what you like, entrepreneurship is not for the fainthearted. Sure, fortune may favor the brave, but having the audacity to run your own business can absolutely bring you to your knees.

Often, women come to me in a pickle, asking for help when they've thrown everything at it and have been through dark nights of the soul, questioning their very existence - never mind their ability to launch, grow and run their own business.

So, this blog is some real talk.

It’s raw, it’s vulnerable, it’s honest…..and yes, I am going to totally overshare on some of my stuff.

I’m speaking directly to you if you’ve ever felt like this. If you’re on your knees, if you don’t know where to turn, if you’re panicking a little bit, I’m here for you.

I’ll take you through the exact steps that I would do—and have done recently—to turn my ship around and go from feeling screwed to smashing it.

I’ve been in business for nine years next month.

In that time, I’ve had two businesses. My first business was a technology recruitment business. On paper, I was absolutely smashing it: decent-sized team, gorgeous offices, an amazing client list - and a very happy accountant. But I was desperately unhappy, growing someone else's version of success.

The second business, the coaching business I have today, lights me up.

I get to work in my zone of genius every day: doing the type of work I want to do with the clients I want to work with.

This has been my sole focus and source of income for the past four years. Yet, I have all the gray hairs and wrinkles from launching and growing two businesses.

I’ve just had the best year ever—turnover increased by 30% from last year.

But I’ve also had plenty of dark times literally crying on the kitchen floor with no idea how to navigate the problem—usually cash flow—I was facing. In fact, I’ve just come out of possibly my biggest crisis yet, and that’s what inspired today’s conversation.

I could lie and say this story is from a client, but that’s not what we’re about.

I want to be raw, honest and vulnerable in the hope that if you need to hear this today, it helps you. I’m not just going to tell you what I went through, but the exact steps I took to get out of it and have my best period ever in business.

When you look at social media, it seems like everyone else is smashing it.

Deals coming in left and right, people hiring, growing, all the shiny stuff.

You’d be forgiven for thinking you’re the only one struggling. It can be a lonely place, being an entrepreneur, being at the top, having no sounding board, making all the decisions with everything on your shoulders. It’s so easy to internalise common business problems and think the problem is you.

If you’re lucky enough to have business peers who are friends, they may share their challenges, but usually, it’s the sanitised version, not the real raw messy stuff that makes you feel less alone. Anyone will struggle in their business many times; what matters is how quickly you can move through the steps to get yourself out of it.

This is what happened to me very recently. I had just made a massive investment in my business, one that made me petrified. I was thinking all sorts of things: Had I been duped? Was this snake oil? Was it going to work for me? Who the hell am I to go after this next level?

The physical symptoms arrived. I got an ear infection right on cue. I was working my backside off at about 60% capacity, full of nervous energy, constantly on edge.

I was exhausted in the evenings, waking up at 3 AM - worrying, obsessing and feeling miserable.

But I did it. I absolutely did it, and I’m out the other side. Here are the steps I took to get there:

1. Acknowledge the feelings

As women, we’re good at squishing our feelings down.

But those feelings don’t go away; they come out in ways that aren’t helpful. I had to acknowledge that I was struggling, and there were a lot of tears.

Processing those feelings was crucial.

2. Reconnect with Daily Essential Standards (DES)

I’d stopped doing the rituals that allow me to show up as my best self. For me, getting back on track meant journaling, ice baths and yoga. These practices kept me grounded and reminded me of my power.

3. Reconnect with my vision

I had to remember why I invested in the first place.

Visualising the next level version of me - and feeling into the energy of already having achieved my goals, helped immensely.

4. Look after myself

My appearance was going to hell. Taking time to do my nails, hair and makeup might sound superficial, but it made a huge difference in how I felt about myself.

5. Check where I am in my cycle

Understanding my menstrual cycle and its impact on my emotions and energy levels was a game-changer. I now know when to start new projects and when to rest.

6. Get support

I reached out to a coach, and it made a world of difference. There’s no need to reinvent the wheel. Getting help from someone I trusted and aligned with was crucial.

7. Recognize Impostor Syndrome

I realized that all my self-doubt and physical symptoms were just my impostor trying to sabotage me. Awareness of this helped me push through.

8. Be kind to myself

I had to learn to rest when needed, eat well, meditate and slow down to speed up. This self-care was essential for my recovery.

9. Focus on my mindset

I had to be mindful of my thoughts - choosing to believe that whatever happened, I would be okay. This centeredness gave me peace and a solid foundation to act from.

These are the nine steps that I took. I’d love to know which of these resonate with you. Feel free to send me a private message if you don’t feel comfortable commenting publicly. Let’s support each other on this journey.